Kermit and my thoughts

A lot of people have been asking for my thoughts on the Kermit Carolina-Xavier situation, and I've been reluctant because of my place as a coach and the fact that it's been covered to death by others. But it really seems like a lot of people are missing the important things of what happened as it relates to high school athletics, and - most importantly - the education of young people. My dad was self-admittedly never the best coach, but he did teach me one important thing, "The officials never decide the game. There is always something you or your team could have done better, so don't make stupid excuses."

So, here are my quick thoughts:

1) You can't publicly criticize officials without retribution

Really, you can't at any level. Professional coaches get fined. College coaches get fined and suspended. High school coaches get .... nothing. I have seen some pretty poor officials in my day, and a couple of times where I thought I was on the end of a "home job". Never would it occur to me to mention it in the media.

To the Athletic Director, yes. But you don't make private grumblings public. Maybe Carolina thought he had no choice? Still no excuse.

And for going on the rant he did, he needed to be punished. A game suspension, or a two-game suspension would have been plenty and at least sent a message that this kind of stuff won't be tolerated (Fired? No. Despite what some bloggers and commenters would make you believe, Carolina - albeit somewhat excessively outspoken - cares deeply about his kids and has a tougher job than most people on the outside will ever know.)

Not punishing him gives the green light to everyone else and their brother to chime in and make the situation worse. First, it was Xavier coach Mike Kohs, who lamented the "lack of class and sportsmanship" that Carolina showed. Then it was umpteen different media reports (like this one). Then it was Board VI's Ed Lynch with a response on WFSB. If Carolina has been given a suspension (or something), then the story would have died a natural death and that would have been the end of it.

2) It is irrelevant whether Carolina is right or wrong in this case

In fact, if you've read me long enough, you probably know I think he's closer to right than wrong on most of what he said.

But he needed to handle his problems in the proper way. I know he doesn't care what people think of him or his program, which is in some ways admirable, but you can't question the integrity of authority (and that's what the officials are in this case) publicly in a high school event. It sends the wrong message to the kids (and adults). Kermit wants to stand up for what he believes in, which is again admirable, but severely misguided in this case. He comes off at best as a poor sport and at worst as an instigator. That won't help solve whatever problems there are, it will just make them worse. Especially given the fact that he won the game in question.

Ironically, the best case of a coach handling things the correct way that I've ever seen came in Week 2 of the 2007 football season in a game between Hillhouse and Xavier in Middletown. Under new coach Tom Dyer, the Acs nearly completed a monumental comeback, but were hurt by a couple of penalties and poor timekeeping (at least twice, the clock failed to stop after first downs and was never detected by the officials).

After the final buzzer, Dyer yelled at the officials and started to run after them as they left the field. But after about three or four steps, he caught himself and stopped, realizing that: a) it was pointless; and b) he was setting a poor example for his players.

By the time I got to him, he was still hot, but kept his emotions in check and never mentioned the officials, "This doesn't define us as a football team," he said. "The kids dug deep in the second half and showed a lot of guts. If we play like that, we'll be fine."

It was extremely classy, and I have the utmost respect for Dyer because of it.

3) The SCC needs its own officiating board (well, duh)

I've been saying this for years, people. It would make it easier to legislate everything, and to me, the only downside would be travel, but the refs can get over it.

In my opinion, especially in football, I think the New Haven board is the best officials the state has to offer. I don't think there are any inherent biases against visiting teams in Middletown (although studies have shown that there are subconscious biases against visiting teams at every level in nearly every sport everywhere, so always keep that in mind).

4) You can't force an apology

Education 101 tells you that you shouldn't force people to apologize. Obviously, if Carolina were to apologize now, he wouldn't mean it. It would mean nothing, except to get him more upset. We're not trying to change his opinion, we're just trying to get him to express it in a more prudent manner. That doesn't mean he's right, but he is entitled to his opinion (but he's not entitled to be immune if he makes public comments, this has nothing to do with the Freedom of Speech. We can use this as a Constitutional lesson, too. Someone call Fox News).

5) Finally, and most importantly, the world needs referees

Everyone realizes that we can't have competitive games without officials, right? And while officials should be evaluated and told if they make mistakes - as with anything else - badgering refs and questioning their ethics does nothing but make people find other ways to use their free time (yes, officials are paid, but no one gets rich from it).

So the vicious cycle continues: referees who have potential quit and are replaced by still more inexperienced refs. And the older ones are forced to stay on longer because there is no one to replace them. So the level of officiating drops.

Eventually, we may get to the point where there aren't enough officials to work all the games.

And then we have no games.